I Guess Pictures are in Order

We are finally home! Urra! Laura is a bit sore and all (for some reason) but is feeling good and has our darling Fenton hanging out with her as we speak. He really is cute.

Here are some pictures we took using the camera (we have more on our phones), so I'll give some minimal commentary and let the photos do the talking.


This first one is Laura between pushes...

Next is newborn Fenton Goss Orsetti! And I do mean newborn, as he is probably no more than a few minutes old here (he went right onto Laura)...

Here is a few minutes later with the proud as hell mama holding her baby...


Fenton is here chilling in Laura's room (no nursery for him!)...

Kestian and Adelaide meet their new baby brother. Laura told them that they had to be careful because he was breakable...

I guess Laura took a picture of me (with the kids' help) giving Fenton his first bath. They wanted him to be under the heat lamp for an hour afterward to keep him warm because I guess snuggling with his mother doesn't make you warm. We declined...

Another picture of that, though the kids switched places...

Kestian was getting emotional from meeting his new brother...

Oh, wait, no he was just rubbing his eyes. They loved meeting and seeing Fenton, but after 10 minutes they asked if they could go home...

Fresh and clean, but his hat is covering his hair, which is a golden blond that is darker than Kestian's. It might look darker in the pictures, but that is just due to the lighting...

Tracing a Name

Fun with family history time now!

Laura has a relative (the brother of her great great grandfather) who did some fun little land dealing in Arizona. Basically, the idea was that he had some fraudulent documents (that I think he knew were fake) that said he owned a huge swath of the state, but the government saw through it. Yet another example of hardworking Americans being kept down by The Man! There are actually a number of books on this (Laura is reading two of them) and it is vastly fascinating. It is a shame that we didn’t really know about this when we were actually, you know, living in Arizona.

James Addison Reavis, however, wasn’t a direct ancestor of Laura; His father, Fenton Goss Reavis, also had a son named Alexander Hamilton Reavis (Laura’s ancestor). He, in turn, had a daughter named Mattie Ola Reavis, who then had a daughter named Barabara Ebinger.

Barbara Ebinger is Laura Grandmother, so we are getting to modern times now, with Laura’s father, born Brian George Orr, the last link in the line until we get to Laura.

Going straight down a single line is interesting for many reasons: it is a bit easier just going down one line (since the ancestors exponentially increase with each generation), we get to see the names as they change from different time periods, and we can see the changing of last names over time, from Reavis to Ebinger to Orr (then McCaughey) to Orsetti. We can also trace the lineage of the name of our newest child.

Fenton Goss Orsetti shares the same first and middle name as his great great great great grandfather Fenton Goss Reavis. The name fits perfectly with our “not common whatsoever” demands while still sounding like a name. It has possibilities of nicknames and pet names (but only for us, you guys need to call him Fenton) and flows really well. Plus, it is an honest-to-goodness family name.

We had this name picked out from the beginning and there was no going back. Ezekiel was never an option, neither was Damon Jr. or Angelo.

One thing, though, I have to admit. Remember when Laura said we gave hints about the name in previous post? Yeah, she lied and I admitted as much. BUT, in that same post where I said we didn’t give any hints, I basically announced the name in a subtle way. Go back to that post and notice that it is broken into two paragraphs, with the first paragraph having six sentences and the second one have four. Now look at the first letter of each sentence of each paragraph.

Yeah, I thought I was clever doing that.

Fenton Goss Orsetti

Fenton Goss Orsetti was born at 11:01 pm on 4/27/2010 weighing 9 freaking pounds and 2 ounces. Laura and Fenton are doing wonderfully right now, he's already latched on and is great and healthy with a full head of darkish goldish hair (even more than Kestian had when he was born). I'll let Laura tell her birth story.

Still waiting...

Picture this:

7:15am

Everyone is up and the kids are dressed and sitting on my bed, waiting for me to go downstairs. I turn around and face the bed, to find Kestian laying in my spot, arching his back up, patty his tummy, so as to emphasize his belly...

"I have a baby in mah belly!" he exclaims, with a joking voice. "I have a BABY in mah BELLY!"

Ahhh. 5-year old humor. Got to love it.

And yes, there is still a baby in my belly. 40 weeks, 3 days. Today's appointment has me now at 3cm dilated, 50% effaced. Oh, and the doc said my cervix looks very nice. So, yeah, I've still got that going for me.

My prediction: Baby will be here before the end of the week. Odds at Las Vegas? 10:1.

One can hope, though, huh?

Plugging along

Today's appointment was short and sweet, so I'll make this post short and sweet too.

• Ultrasound shows that the baby's weight has not changed since the last ultrasound 10 days ago (still 7lbs 8 oz) (and I've lost another pound or so). Weight gain slows at the end of pregnancy so this isn't anything to be alarmed about, although I thought for sure that he (and I) would have gained something.
• I'm 2cm dilated and was told that, as far as my cervix goes, "conditions are favorable for labor to start." Of course one can be at 2cm for quite a while. Only thing is that I don't know how long I've been at 2cm. One day? Two weeks? What does this mean, really?
• If nothing happens before next Monday, I'll go back in for another appointment then. Seriously? Are we even talking about going late? People at work have stopped putting in for the "Pickle Pool" because this baby just keeps waiting and waiting...
  

I felt this incredible sadness during the ultrasound, as I watched pictures of him on the screen. I just want to hold him, to smell him. But yet he stays put. I can't touch him yet. So close and yet so far.

Anyway, last night I was full of energy again, although not like a few weeks ago. But the trash and recycling are out, the bathrooms are clean(er), the dishes are washed, and the bills are paid. Damon mowed the grass. The kids' overnight bags are packed (again). Friends are on call. It's hard to be in stand-by mode all the time.

Meanwhile...

Lest we not forget the two most beautiful joys in my life. Here are their school pictures, taken just a few weeks after they turned 5...

A whole lot of nothing

I'm sure people are wondering what the heck is going on... Well, join the party.

Yes, on Monday afternoon we really did think labor had started. Contractions were regular at 7-8 minutes apart and staying like that for a while. My doc said he wanted me to come in when they were 10 min apart (to monitor my scar), but we decided to wait until they were more closer to the typical 5 min apart...just to make sure things were actually happening.

So we went home, had a walk, took showers, got stuff together, and waited. The 7-min contractions went on for hours. Mostly 7 min apart. Some 11 min, some 4 min, but it seemed pretty regular. Only it wasn't really progressing. We kept waiting. We had dinner, took the kids to a friend's house. More waiting. We all kept wondering "Is this it?"

Eventually I went to bed around midnight since it wasn't moving along. I slept until about 3:30am and awoke wondering if the contractions were still there. They were, but around 10-min apart. I thought it had slowed from sleeping, but that it was a good sign that it was still happening. This stage of labor is just slow, right? I went back to bed around 5:30am and got up at 7:00am. Still some contractions, but I could tell they were slowing down. By lunch I was still having some, but it was getting more random. At this point, I wanted to just go back to work but Damon insisted I stay home, so I eventually took a nap hoping that relaxing would get it going again. But by the evening the contractions were almost non-existent. I was extremely frustrated. I really did think that my baby was about to come, and then...nothing. I'm a little tired of all this "nothing-ness." And I was mad at myself that I had the kids stay with a (very kind and gracious) friend for "nothing" and got my kids' hopes up for "nothing." Very frustrating. And disappointing.

So I'm back to work today, trying to stay distracted and busy - and not burn up all of my time before I'm out. I'm continually surprised by how many people don't understand that the only way you get paid during maternity leave is by using your vacation/sick time. There is no "paid time off" given through FMLA or any other avenue. And since I don't hardly even have the bare minimum of 6 weeks saved up for vacation/sick time, I can't afford even a day off before the baby comes. I'm very fortunate that my work is allowing me to do some work from home while on my leave to cover the time I'm short, but it's a tight situation. It's times like this that I wished I lived in Canada.

Anyhow, we are two days away from my due date, and doc said he doesn't want to make a plan just yet in case I go late, but said we will have to talk when we get to 41 weeks when he starts to get concerned about placental effectiveness. We'll cross that bridge when we get there, but at least he's not saying "41 weeks = c-section." There's not much activity at this point, but I do think it will be soon, rather than getting to 41 weeks. I'm pretty sure I lost "the plug" (Ewww! Is that too much information?) so really it will be for real soon. I guess only baby knows when...

(And sorry Dad, I guess you won't be sharing your birthday with the baby. I was hoping you guys would get to, but I guess baby wants his own day.)

Laura at the Start of Labor

Today after lunch Laura started labor. Nothing huge like water breaking or anything, but definitely contractions of the real type. She texted me while I was in the middle of giving a presentation to my lab and I probably lost a bit of focus afterward and probably rushed through it (I had time before she was back in her office since she went for a walk).

We then went home, went for a long walk, and then assessed the situation. Since Laura, while still contracting and all, had not progressed into real bad contractions or later stages of labor (there might be terms for this, but I cannot be bothered to look them up), we went and got the kids and ate out at Fazoli's. We then dropped the kids off at a friend's house.

(Sidebar here: I know I sometimes complain about the kids and how they drive me crazy and stress me out, but I really love them and right now I miss them terribly. I know they are safe, I know they are fine, I know Laura needs me, and I know it is only one night, but I feel so sad and guilty and miss them more than I can really comprehend. I did chat with who they are staying with and know they are fine, so I feel a little better. But I miss those little rats. Little Angelo Giovanni better appreciate this!)

So we've been sitting in a somewhat holding pattern here so far in the evening. Laura is doing the contraction thing, but isn't to the point of having our Doula come over, let alone go to the hospital. She lazed around, took a bath, and is now resting and trying to get some sleep (with visions of placentas dancing in her head?).

This is just a heads up for everyone on how the labor is going. It looks unlikely that Ezekial will be born tonight, so tomorrow may be the day! Hope his grandpa doesn't mind sharing a birthday!

I'll post when I can, but I won't be bringing my laptop to the hospital (it has a damn virus on it that I just found and haven't been able to disinfect it yet) and don't know how to post via iPhone yet, so you'll just have to follow us on Facebook or word-of-mouth.

And don't worry, once the kid is born we'll post a detailed explanation of his name (though the 'jr.' at the end might make it obvious).

Feel free to send good thoughts or sarcastic thoughts or whatever, but in lieu of prayers please send cash.

Collections and Obsessions...who's to blame, really?

As you know, the kids love to watch Dinosaur Train. It's a very good program and I even enjoy it too. They learn tons of dinosaur facts, whether it be that some dinosaurs had feathers, some dinosaurs where very small, or that every dinosaur poops. Good stuff. But the show seems to have an added effect on the kids.

You see, one of the main characters (I can't remember which one) loves to collect things. Kestian seems to have noticed it and has taken it upon himself to also collect things. And in turn, so has Adelaide. Adelaide has always been more of a rock collector, but she has taken inspiration from her brother. Kestian likes to collect what any 5 year old boy likes to collect: toilet paper rolls, empty Kleenex boxes, and applesauce cups. Both have acquired an impressive stash. Please note exhibits 1, 2, and 3:

Exhibit 1: Kestian's stash of boxes and rolls (other other "important" bits of paper)

Exhibit 2: Adelaide's stash...more boxes and rolls, and one of my figurines that seems to float from room to room

Exhibit 3: Kestian's collection of applesauce cups (no comment on how much applesauce we eat)

The kids use the applesauce cups for tea parties and random sorting activities, so I am happy to oblige with collecting and washing them. The boxes and rolls have been a part of several crafts, but mostly they sit around collecting dust (would that be another collection?). But God forbid if I should try to get rid of them.

Now, if you really know me you know that I am a collector as well. I like to think of myself as a pragmatic collector though. I save stuff that I know we will use sometime in the next 25 years... Oh sure, I collect other things too, like stamps, sweaters, beanie babies... But really, who can say that that is not pragmatic too? Sweaters are useful when it's cold out, beanie babies are useful as bribes for the kids, and stamps...well, we all know how wonderful stamps are that I don't even need to go there...

So maybe Kestian's collecting is somehow connected to me, just as Kestian's obsession with animals/dinosaurs, or Adelaide's semi-obsessive behaviors, are strangely similar to Damon's. I'll still blame Dinosaur Train for it, but deep down, I probably only have myself to blame.

39 weeks

It's official. I'm obsessed. Until this baby is born, it's about all I can think about or write about. Actually I don't even have that much to write about. I'm just in waiting-mode, and I hate it. Let's get this going already! I mean, seriously, nothing. is. happening.

Except that enough is happening to make me think it's happening, but then nothing happens. Take for example: last Monday. I woke up with a HUGE amount of energy. I felt like I could run a marathon, move mountains, put them back again, AND birth the baby. Some called it nesting, but it wasn't this overwhelming urge to clean or get ready...it was just an inexplicable amount of energy. I don't "do" caffeine but I'd imagine it was as if I had about 6 Red Bulls and half a dozen cups of coffee. I couldn't sit still. I couldn't concentrate. It was very weird. Everyone said that the baby would be coming soon. My energy crashed, and no baby came.

Then there are the random contractions. I've basically stopped paying attention to any contractions at this point. It never goes anywhere. It just starts and stops. But then I sometimes get a few big ones in a row and I think "Here we go!!!!!" And then nothing. Nothing.

So....whatever! We all just continue to wait, marveling at how I am still pregnant. I even was asked the other day: "How many are you carrying?" Yeah. I'm sooo done.

On the plus side, at our last appt my doc said he had read my birth plan and didn't find much of anything in it to be concerned about (as in "no issues"). Which is good because I have in there things like: no epidural, no continuous monitoring, don't cut the cord until it stops pulsing, no eye ointment, etc. Basically, leave me the hell alone to birth this baby, then leave us all the hell alone when we're done. So that's good. Perhaps Damon was right that this doc is more amenable to VBACs than I give him credit for. I've just read so much on The Unnecesarean and other websites that I am too suspect. Perhaps it will just all go well. But that doesn't mean I won't have my game on.

Of course, my real concern anymore is whether or not I can even go through with this whole crazy VBAC thing. It sounds very valiant on paper and all, but I've had a couple doozies of a contraction, leading me to wonder if I can truly handle labor. Damon says he won't let me chicken out, and my doula I'm sure will help me stay motivated. I hope they both just slap me silly when I'm 20 minutes into it all and begging for an epidural.

But that's neither here nor there, is it? Why? Because...nothing is happening....

Fake Facebook Friends

So I got a friend request from someone on Facebook who I do no know. Some people gladly accept those requests, but I don’t (I usually let them sit there for awhile in a limbo of non-decisions and eventually message them and ask them who they are). This happened a few months ago with someone named Tiffany Black who, after a week, started to post mean stories about someone else who I do not know. Apparently, from what I could tell, that was a fake account who only got friends of someone to tell rumors about them (don’t ask me why they picked me though, since I knew no one they friended). The account was taken down soon afterwards because it probably was a fake. I never did accept the friend request.

So yesterday I got another friend request from someone I do not know. Hey, here is a screenshot of the person’s profile!



Now, lets look at every reason why I think it is fake!

1) I do not know who this person is.

2) This person is listed as in the same graduating class from my high school, but I do not remember anyone with that name in my school (let alone graduating class) and there isn’t any record of him in my yearbook. Maybe he dropped out before graduating or maybe this was just a typo, but there is no evidence of him ever existing in my class. Plus, I don’t know who he is even if he did exist.

3) The name is so horribly generic that it sounds made up; “John Green” sounds TOO generic. If he picked a too unique sounding name then people would know he wasn’t real because they would remember someone like Rodolfo Ezekial Cuthbert IV, but he went too far the other way and made a name that people would remember simply because it is generic. Since I am already suspicious of him being fake, the name makes me even more doubting.

4) No profile picture. Now, this could be because he is new and hasn’t gotten around to putting one up yet, but come on, everyone puts one up! Not a point toward ‘real person.’

5) Birthday of January 1, which is the default fake birthday that people give.

6) Activities: baseball, football, golf. Eh, this is pretty generic, but again the generic stuff is a bit of a red flag for ‘fake.’

7) Interests: Spending money…lol…going on as many vacations as possible. Ahhhh, I see, he is fake and trying to attract the womens! Look, he likes to spend money! Who would ever say that? Totally fake and totally trying to impress the ladies. Same with the vacations. This is damning evidence people!

8) Favorite Music: anything and everything. Another super generic response! He is not real.

9) Favorite TV shows: How I met your mother…big bang theory. Oddly specific, this is a rare non-strike against him.

10) Favorite Movies: anything that makes me laugh. Again super generic.

11) About me: Lost my wife two years ago…ready to start dating to see whats out there. Ahhhh, just like on Seinfeld, he knows the widower gets the most sympathy! He really is playing up the ‘rich, single, but a good guy look I am a widower which is why I am still single at 35’ angle. Too smooth to be real.

12) Lists “emergency room doctor” as his profession and is in groups “doctors” and “single doctors” in case you didn’t notice that he was a doctor. Obviously over advertising. Again, he is too eager to show everyone he is a doctor (I’m surprised he isn’t listed as Dr. John Green, M.D.), which makes it suspicious.

So, what do you guys think? Is he real? Should I friend him? Will he go out on a date with me? Does it matter that he is OBVIOUSLY NOT REAL? The real question is, who is the real person making this fake profile and do they really need a Farmville neighbor that badly?

Letters to our brother

Dear Baby Orsetti,

We hope that you are doing well. Mommy asked us if there was anything we would like to ask you. I hope you heard me when I leaned over to Mommy's belly and said "When are you coming out?" I want to know what you look like. My cheeks/nose? Adelaide's chin? What color hair will you have?

Anyway, hope you are doing well. We are waiting for you and already love you soooo much!

Love,
Kestian

-------------

Dear Baby Orsetti,

I want to second what Kestian says. We can't wait to see and want to know what you look like. Mommy says you'll be here soon, but what is "soon?" Do you know? We would like you to come today or tomorrow. Mommy can't pick us up, can't pull our wagon, or do much of anything but sit on the couch in the evening. We can't imagine her belly getting much bigger. Mommy looks like she will fall over soon.

We love you and hope you come soon. I am saving a penny for you.

Love,
Adelaide

No Such Thing as Anonymity

There really is no anonymity on the Internet. Sure you can do some stuff to make yourself appear anonymous, but you will always leave footprints.

So if, for example, you leave an asshole message on one of our posts anonymously, don’t think we don’t know who it was. I’ll let everyone in on a secret: we have two trackers embedded in this site which tell us who visits. We’ve mentioned this in the past when we get visitors from someplace cool like Andorra, but mostly it is something we just use to see where people come from (mostly from links on Facebook anymore though). But I thought maybe it would be time to remind everyone of this fact.

I would also like to remind people that this blog is not written as pure entertainment, but instead is something to keep family and friends updated on the goings on in our life. Sure, it might get boring and sure, it might get bitchy about things that aren’t that bad, but if you don’t like it then DON’T READ IT. There are lots of other places on the Internet and thousands of other blogs that are just as mundane as ours. Seriously, if you have any problem with what we write, then feel free to shut up and never visit again. It is that simple.

Now, most of you are thinking “Why is he being a jerk? I didn’t do anything” and you’d be right because most people that visit here are nice and are visiting because they care about the Stuck in Kentucky Orsetti family (SIKOF?). We love you guys! But sometimes people are jerks, and we don’t want them around.

As a safeguard against people posting jerkish things, we are now instituting a ‘no anonymous comment’ policy on this blog. Sorry it has come to this, but if you want to comment, you’ll have to log in using your GMail or some other account (I don’t know the details, Laura will probably post them).

And to the person who posted this message on the last post: “quit bitching some women would love to be able to get pregnant and have just 1 child let alone 3 gifts” do know that we know exactly who you are. EXACTLY. Also you should quit bitching because even if a woman can’t get pregnant it does not mean she cannot have a child. Besides, you do have a child, so what are YOU bitching about?

Let’s leave on a happier note! I finally put up flagpoles flanking our garage, so now we are proudly flying an American and an Italian flag for all to see!

Are we done yet? Answer: NO!

It's been a roller-coaster lately. Feelings of inexplicable energy and hopes that "today will be the day," followed by disappointment when nothing happens. Moments of "I can't wait to be done," mixed with "he'll get here when he gets here." Of course, I cycle through this every few hours and am often left with the frustration that I am so uncomfortable and can't do anything about it and nothing is happening and I'm doomed to be like this forever. I told Damon that I might as well get a new Social Security Number to account for the "new me" that I'll forever be. Do they have a category for "Eternally Pregnant?"

Oh yeah, and there's the chance that I may go late! You know, like past my due date. Oh, yeah, it happens (to other women), but I planned on being done by April 23rd, and secretly planned on being done way before April 23rd. With 10 days to my due date, a god-awful-excruciatingly-long 10 days, I just want to cry at the thought that this could carry on into May. Yeah, I'm a mess.

So let's stop complaining (just for a moment) and get you updated on the recent news:

The last doc appointment had Junior measuring at 7lbs 8 oz! Wow! Did you hear me? 7 lbs 8 oz? Wow! We were trying to guess his weight at the appt but, at least for me, when we heard his weight, I was impressed that I could make a baby that big, knowing that he is still growing and may be close to 8 lbs when he is born (that is if he ever is born, see above). Of course, then I realized that I will have to move this 8 lb mass out of my body and got just a little freaked out. And by little, I mean a lot. And by a lot I mean, whoa....let's think this through for a second. Forget the whole alieness of it all, that there is another human being occupying my gut, and imagine that there is nothing strange at all about that. Now imagine that it has to get out. And there's only one way. I think the following conversation sums it all up:

Kestian: Where will the baby come out?

Mommy: Through my vagina.

Kestian: Wow! You must have a really big vagina.

Thanks, Kestian. So much for telling the kids like it is. Let's not all dwell on that image for very long. Let's just imagine that the baby will drink the Alice in Wonderland juice, shrink to the size of a mouse, wiggle through the "magic door" and, voila!, be baby-size again. I'm pretty sure that's actually how it works. There really is no other explanation.

Oh, except for that I've watched a thousand birth videos and I'm pretty sure that that's not what happens at all. If you've not had the chance to see a birth, I recommend that you go watch some of those videos, and then come back and tell me that it's all good. Ha! I dare you!!!

So that's where we are for now. Life goes on. Heh... "life." Call it what you want. I like to think of it as "ok this sucks now and I want my body and my life back and to not have contractions all the time and feel like a cow and be able to walk faster than .00001/miles and hour and not be hot all the time and be able to pick up my kids for once and be able to sleep on my belly and to fit into normal clothes again." Hmph! (arms crossed and frowny face)

Well, since I'm trying to stay positive, I'll leave you with this. At least his ultrasound picture is cute:

Suck it up

Dear Mommy,

I have read your kind letter but have decided at this time to kindly decline your request. Don't get me wrong, I can't wait to meet you, Papa, and my brother and sister. But the way I see it...I've still got lots of time.

Seriously, what's the rush? Do you really want to change my poopy diapers? Do you really want to be up all night with me (because oh yes! you will be up all night with me)? Do you really want to be more busy? Oh, sure, you are uncomfortable, but really that's not my problem. You'll survive this. You'll soon forget this. It will be over soon.

So I say, for now, that we leave well enough alone. I've got a good two weeks before you can start saying that I'm "due." Enjoy your last two weeks. I plan to. And who knows, maybe I'll even decide to come later. I'm a big fan of surprises. It'll be a game-time decision at that point.

I did want to thank you, however, for the offer of a Thomas the Train sticker if I were to come out by now. While tempting, I felt that I would have little use for a sticker at this point. If you would consider sweetening the pot, I may re-evaluate your offer. But, mind, you, this will be your last chance. I expect something really good.

Until then, keep up the hard work and have a little patience...

See you soon (enough)
Baby Orsetti

Waiting...

Dear Baby Orsetti,

I thought I would write to you today to let you know how I can't wait to see you. It's been 8 1/2 months with you inside me. I still marvel at how little I am weirded-out at the fact that I have a human body growing in me. The very alien-ness of it all should freak out even the most rational person, but it concerns me little.

But your time has come. I am done carrying you on the inside, and would much prefer to carry you on the outside. Don't you want to meet you Mama, your Papa, your brother and sister? We are all patiently waiting, but patience is running out.

Each day that passes and we get closer to your "due date" I grow more and more tired of waiting. The belly is ridiculously huge. The restless legs are mostly intolerable anymore. The insomnia, the ligament pain, the tiredness, the swelling, the inability to see my feet... I'm done with it all.

Yet you continue to stay where you are. I hope you are making good use of your time in there, as I have been doing so out here. But, come on already, let's get this over with! You were meant to be with me, with us, out here. In the sun. In my arms. Don't you know that it's time?

I can feel that you are getting ready, that my body is getting ready. The contractions and cramps are getting stronger. My mood is shifting into mega-maternal. I can't imagine life without you. Yet, for whatever reason, neither you or my body seems to be in any sort of rush. I feel so out of touch with my body some times. My mind keeps telling my body "it's time to birth this baby," but I think my body has it's headphones on and is merrily dancing along without a sense of what I'm saying.

Oh, yeah, I know it's hasn't been "40 weeks," but wouldn't you agree that it's "good enough" by now? I'll tell you what, if you come today, or even tomorrow, I'll give you a sticker! No good? It's a Thomas the Train sticker.... Still nothing? Well it works for your brother and sister, so I thought I'd give it a try. How about a big hug and kiss, a warm blanket, and never letting you go? Sounds pretty good, ey?

Well if you are up for it, then let's get things going. I've cleared my calendar, cleaned up the house, paid all the bills...so I'm good to go. All you have to do is be born. Tick tock!

Love,
Mommy

How does your garden grow?

First there was a shed...
And then there was none...

Soon the supplies arrived...

And work was begun...

The gardens were built...

And soil was added...

Now all we need is to get the stuff planted...

The numbers game. Are you in?

Ok Ok. I promise to not mess with my faithful audience anymore. Thanks for being such good sports yesterday!

Today I wanted to talk about upcoming possible due dates, and why I like them. In fact, let's just analyze all the possible due dates this month, just for fun.

Ready? Here we go!

4/1/10 - Ok this has come and gone, but I thought it would be fun to have an April Fool's baby. Also the "Oh Four, Oh One, One Oh" would be fun to say. Oh well.

4/2/10 - This is today. Not going to happen, but it is ok. "Four-Two-Ten" has a nice ring to it, and I like that half of four is two. Yes, I'm weird like that.

4/3/10 - Hmm... Nothing too fantastic about this day. Next.

4/4/10 - Ok, now this would be a cool birthday. It just rolls right off your tongue: "Four-Four-Ten." I could deal with that.

4/5/10 - I would like this date too. Nothing great about "4/5/10", but the 5th (of March) is the kids' birthday, so it would be fun to have Junior also on the 5th.

4/6/10 - I wouldn't mind this too, as Damon's birthday falls on the 6th of March. They could bond over matching birth "days," if nothing else.

4/7/10 - Meh. Nothing to get me excited.

4/8/10 - It's ok. Eight is twice that of four, so I find a some more of that "number fun" with it. Take it or leave it though.

4/9/10 - Nothing much to talk about here. Let's move on...

4/10/10 - This is an awesome birth date. The kids are 3/5/5, and this date follows the same pattern with 4/10/10. Me likes.

4/11/10, 4/12/10, 4/13/10 - Meh. Meh. Meh. The "Four Twelve Ten" is kind of neat to say, but nothing to write home about.

4/14/10 - Again, fun with mixing the "4"s and "1"s, plus there is a bit of alliteration going on here. I could live with it.

4/15/10 - Tax day. Wouldn't it be fun to have a Tax Day baby? Answer is YES!

4/16/10 - Hmmm. I like this only because four goes into sixteen four times. This would be ok.

4/17/10, 4/18/10 - Nothing exciting here.....

4/19/10 - This is ok only because I was born on the 19th of the month. Another bonding opportunity.

4/20/10 - My Dad's birthday. How cool would it be if my son and my father shared the same birthday? If I have to wait a while, this would be a good day to go with.

4/21/10 - Boring...

4/22/10 - Hmm. It would be ok because our anniversary is also on the 22nd of the month. It's also Damon's favorite number, so he'd probably be thrilled.

4/23/10 - This is Junior's actual due date. I think it would be cool if he was born on his due date, something that actually only happens less than 5% of the time.

4/24/10 - Hmm. Ok. Not bad. Do you see a trend? I like the birth dates that have four or some number divisible by four (but only because we're talking about April. If it were May it would all be about the fives).

4/25/10, 4/26/10, 4/27/10 - Blah. Blah. And blah.

4/28/10 - It's ok...mostly because it's divisible by four.

4/29/10 - Shall we move on?

4/30/10 - This is actually ok. The 30 and 10 are nice round numbers.

5/1/10 - Ok shall I even go into May at this point? Tell ya what, if it's May 1st and I'm still pregnant, I will do this again, although in a more grumpier state of mind.

What's your favorite due date?

An explantion of the name

As promised, I will explain the choice of name that Laura said in the previous post:

When Laura approached me about writing her April Fool's joke post, the only thing she asked of me was a good fake name to say we are naming our kid. I, being the world's experts on bad names, thought about it and tried to think of a name that was the antithesis of our name demands. I thought at first to use the most common names from 2008 (2009 isn't out yet), so the name Jacob Michael was our first candidate. I wasn't convinced because Adelaide already suggested Jacob as a name, and I thought people wouldn't believe that we would pick that. But I sent it to Laura with the a couple of hackneyed and unimaginative alternative spellings (changing the C to K, replacing any vowel with a Y, unnecessarily doubling letters) like Jacyb Mykhaell. Laura wasn't having any of that because it would be too obvious.

You see, the best part of any sort of prank is the believability of it. Saying we gave birth today would be too obvious and WAY too believable, but saying that Laura really gave birth to a mixed race black/Asian baby would be too unbelievable (or, at least, I would hope so). So with the name, as with all of her post (the entire thing was fake, you do know right?), had to have this feeling of 'well it is weird, but I guess that sounds like something they'd do.' The name had to reflect that, but couldn't be so outlandish that it would distract from the rest of the post (remember, the name was not the main point of the joke post, it was just a digestif.

My next name choice was Maddyson Michael, but quickly changed to Madison Michael to undue too much of the alternative spellings which would make it too obvious. I stuck with Michael because it is still way common, and, before Jacob took over, was the most common boys name forever. Believable, but not something that you would expect from us. Madison I picked because it is often nowadays associated with girls, but could easily be the worst girls name ever, though Addison is probably worse. Despite that, however, those names just didn't feel like the right names for that fake post.

Which brought us to the heavily Italian names that we picked. I have nothing against picking good wop names, but it isn't really something that I'm strongly drawn to. When we were thinking of names for Adelaide, the name Giovanna came up and I actually like that name a lot. The problem is, however, it is the most popular girls name in Italy and EVERYONE in American would pronounce it as four syllables (it is only three), including Laura. So the heavily Italian names isn't something that is counter to our philosophy, but not something we invest in either.

The first name suggested was Vincenzo, which I've always loved ever since the old stamp commercial "You're too good for Vincenzo!" (which I cannot find on youtube for the life of me, Laura give me a hand on this), plus you KNOW that is Italian when you hear it. Angelo was the original middle name, but we knew that for the full effect of Angelo to be had it must be first, so we bumped it up.

Angelo is great because it is ONLY an Italian name (Angel is Spanish, but not Angelo), and we don't have an equivalent in English so it stands out. You meet someone named Angelo and you know he is from Jersey or New York, so Angelo had to stay. Plus there is no obvious nickname where he doesn't sound like girl.

However, Vincenzo isn't the best middle name because it is a bit too strong, plus people might mispronounce the C, so we went with Giovanni, which people will still miss pronounce (three syllables people not four), but retains its wopness no matter what.

So that is how we picked that name so that it was believable and not over the top, but something which we would never actually use. And yes, I did put that much thought into it.

To summarize: THE PREVIOUS POST WAS AN APRIL FOOL'S JOKE.

Bad News, Good News...but mostly sucky news

[Time to come clean, this was an April Fools Joke by Laura. And even though I did pick the name out, it is not what we are naming our kid. I was sorting through this post to figure out what was actually true about it, and the only thing I can find was that we really did have a doctor's appointment today. -Damon]

I'll tell ya, this pregnancy is just going on and on. Sure, it hasn't been 40 weeks (YET!), but it seems forever.

Well, guess what? My doc appointment today revealed some frustrating news. The due date we've been going with is just way off. I'm sort of surprised, but not really. I originally had the due date of April 28th. Then they moved it up to April 23rd. But now they are telling me May 9th! Can you believe it? I mean that's like another 2 1/2 weeks past what we thought! How could they be so far off? But the doc said they sometimes get these things wrong and they prefer to go more by the baby's development than basing it off of the last period. I guess that makes sense...

So I was thinking I was in the home stretch, but now I feel like it really is going to go on forever. This isn't fair. I'm so done. Now.

But wait! That's not all... My doctor said today that he'll be on sabbatical for the summer, starting in May. WHAT? No no no! If I go to my "new" due date I'll have to have some other doctor. I don't even know who it could be. Does anyone else have these problems? Now, I do have Damon and my doula, and I was reassured that some doctor will be there, but I'm just wondering how I will get through it. And then the nurse casually threw in that the new hospital is already full, and I can expect that I'll have to use the "old" hospital. She told me today that they get real busy in the late spring, and the new facility isn't designed to hold that many babies (although the rest of the year it is fine).

Ok, so let's review: my due date has been pushed back, my doctor will be out of town, and the hospital may be too full to take me. Next thing I'm going to be told is that they've changed their policy and don't do VBACs. I better not jinx myself!!!

And the sucky thing about all of this is that the kids are so excited and I don't think they can stand an even longer wait. Pretty soon they are going to just be like "What-EVAR, Mom!" I can't blame them.

Well I guess that at least it gives us some more time to be a family of four. To be more and more uncomfortable. To waddle around.

Yuck. Yuck. Yuck.

Now, I'm sure you are as disappointed as I am about all of this. And I know that so many of you are just dying to know what we are going to name the baby, and are sad to have to wait even longer. We've really wanted to save the big name reveal for when the baby comes, but in light of everything we decided that we would go ahead and reveal the name so that everyone would have some "fun" news out of all of this.

Ok, so here goes...(drum roll please....) Introducing:

Angelo Giovanni Orsetti

I think it fits well with our "not in the top 100 names" choices and reflects his strong Italian heritage. Damon will give you the back story on it at some point.

We can't wait to meet our little guy...whenever he comes...